Wrestling With God

Hi, I’m Joni Eareckson Tada with a word about crippling grace.

You often hear me say that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me, and it’s true. I can and do. But sometimes I don’t jump right on it. There are times when the challenges of COVID-19 and the daily demands of my disability and my chronic pain, and, you know, one thing piles on top of another, and I’m not always quick to go to God for needed grace and strength. Like, not long ago, a sudden pressure sore forced me to spend a week in bed. Overnight, everything stopped. Everything got put on hold. I was flat on my back 24/7 for more than a week, and lying there all that time made my pain much worse than I am accustomed to. It was the perfect storm for discouragement. And a little self-pity. It was one of those times when I just felt like I can’t do this.

But I’ve lived long enough in my wheelchair to know that when I can’t do this, God can. I may think my situation is impossible, but God specializes in impossibilities. And so when I’m in bed for a season, and when I’m dealing with pain, and when I find myself wrestling with God, yet muster the courage to say, “I can do all things – even this – through Christ,” the grace that God then gives is extraordinary. It’s so extraordinary that it has a special name. It is grace that has been hard fought-for and hard-won, and Kent Hughes calls that kind of strength from God, “crippling grace.” The kind of grace that Jacob experienced when he wrestled with the angel of the Lord; it left him with a painful limp, but his new brokenness absolutely transformed Jacob, leaving him a better person.

And the same is true for us. Staying in bed for a week, all the while battling pain, cannot help but transform you. And although the things you battle are different from what I wrestle with, I know you’d say the same. When you struggle through some deep hardship; when you find yourself wrestling with the angel of the Lord, you come out of it wounded, don’t you? But transformed. And that transformation is the mark of God’s presence in your life. Yep, you’ve experienced crippling grace.

My friend Kory Capps says, “Pain and blessing are not mutually exclusive…divine encounters are not always what we expect.” When God shows up, sometimes it is in a whirlwind, a storm or a whisper; but often, you will encounter God in a wrestling match that’s all “gritty and sweaty.” Then he goes on to say, life-transformation happens when “Creator and creature grapple in close quarters,” as with God and Jacob. Yes, it’s hard and it hurts, but it’s “God’s executing his sanctifying power through painful [circumstances] where he shows up in wrestling gear.”

Time and again, God’s crippling grace gives me the strength to think, you know, there really are many more people with disabilities in far worse situations; I don’t dare let self-pity rule the day! So, while I was in bed, I praised God; I memorized scriptures; I prayed for others; I sang to the Lord; I wrote letters; I composed radio programs; I made phone calls to encourage other people. Psalm 41 verse 3 says, “The Lord will uphold him even on his sickbed; and you will transform his bed of illness into health.” Friend, that’s the way of crippling grace; he delights in transforming your lowest moments into opportunities to heal and serve. So, grapple with the Lord if you must, but don’t leave that wrestling match without embracing crippling grace. And that’s your good word today from joniradio.org.

© Joni and Friends

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