Our 37th Anniversary
Hi, I’m Joni Eareckson Tada and Ken and I are celebrating big time!
That’s because today is our 37th wedding anniversary – and both of us are just so grateful, so glad that we are here, we are healthy (for the most part), and we are still in love; in fact, more so than when we first said “I do” back in the early 80s. Ken and I were talking about that very thing just recently when I was hospitalized with heart and lung problems, all related to my paralysis. Thankfully, they gave me a good-sized hospital room, and for two weeks my husband camped out in a little cot next to my hospital bed. At that time, my breathing was weak and shallow, and Ken – bless his heart – just didn’t want to risk leaving my side. He didn’t want to leave it up to the night nurses to help if I started coughing (I was also struggling with pneumonia); no, rather, Ken wanted to get up and help. I kept insisting that he go home and rest; let a friend stay overnight in the hospital with me, but he wouldn’t hear of it. “Joni,” he insisted, “I want to be here. I wouldn’t feel comfortable, wouldn’t feel right if I weren’t.” And so, if I needed the breathing machine or if I had to expel any phlegm, Ken was right there with the tissues and tubes, and the oximeter and the spirometer, making sure I could clear my chest, get comfortable, and go back to sleep.
Now, I don’t know how to explain this, but looking back on that experience? My husband and I both agreed that it drew us so near, so tight, so much more closely together. You would think after more than three and a half decades of marriage, well, we pretty much would have experienced it all; we’d pretty much know each other; we’d understand each other well. But God has designed trials in such a way that after we go through them, we are changed. We are different. We are shaped into a clearer image of Christ. And I’m convinced that’s true not only for individuals, but for marriages. When you come through a tough trial with your spouse, your marriage is changed; it reflects so much more clearly the purpose Christ has for you in your life together with your loved one.
Now you’d think that should happen mainly during those dreamy moments when you and your spouse enjoy carefree times, all starry-eyed from candlelight and romance. But that’s not how God designed love to grow. Love grows in the way described in 1 Peter chapter 5 verse 10, “So after you have suffered a little while, [God] will restore, support, and strengthen you, and He will place you on a firm foundation.” In other words, when a couple pulls their weight and stays committed through a tough time, God restores, supports and strengthens their marriage with an even firmer foundation of love – not romantic love, but the rock-solid, deep, firm kind of love that comes from out of this world.
That’s what Ken and I are celebrating tonight as we toast 37 years together, years of sweet, but very hard times given my disability. You know, my husband and I talk a lot about this in our book called Joni & Ken: An Untold Love Story, and if you know a couple who are struggling right now, you might want to recommend it to them, or visit our online store at joniandfriends.org. And remember, at the end of the day, you can either focus on what is tearing you apart, or on what is keeping you together. So couples? Let’s not love with word and talk, let’s love in faith and action. And what a beautiful marriage you’ll have!
© Joni and Friends
Joni & Ken: An Untold Love Story
After 30 years of marriage, Ken and Joni offer readers a rare and candid account of their journey through quadriplegia, depression, pain, and cancer – and reveal a hope founded on God’s grace alone. Let their story inspire and encourage your own life and marriage!
